Why Counter-Offers Don't Work Out

I had been with my first agency for more than 5 years. I had seen the company grow from a medium-sized agency into a giant mega-agency, and had lived through many changes of staff, management, and policy. It was with some sadness that I decided it was time for me to leave. My company had merged with what was then our sister company, and my department had inherited a manager who was already occupying the exact role that I had been working toward, meaning that my promotion opportunities had taken a knock. I had received a good offer from a rival agency, and all that was left was to hand in my notice to my employer.

And here's where it got difficult. All my bravado filled evenings of discussion with significant others (often over a glass of wine or three) had not prepared me for the fact that I would feel quite emotional when push came to shove. A Cab Sauv inspired "They'll be sorry!" did not quite cut it when sat across a table from the MD who had been the very person to take a chance on me, hire me, and train me in the first place.

I had prepared my letter of resignation, and I managed to keep my cool as I explained my reasons for leaving, and admitted that I had accepted another job. I anticipated that they may be sorry to see me go, and perhaps be a little annoyed that I was 'disloyally' going to a competitor. I did not anticipate that my MD would be kind, that he would listen nicely, and then bring in other managers who would all do the same. I certainly did not anticipate that the MD would seem genuinely disappointed that I had not talked to him sooner, and would then ask me what they could do to make me stay.

If the problem was lack of promotion opportunity, then they could give me a new section. They had another department which already had 2 more junior staff on it, and they needed a more experienced consultant to steer it in the right direction. They said nice things about me, and made me feel warm and fuzzy and wanted. There was talk of my earnings potential being revised upward. I began to feel very sad about leaving this office behind, with all these nice people who had known me for so long, and valued me more than I had realised. I had been to people's weddings... birthdays... what was I thinking? Why would I leave?

As I visibly wavered and wibbled about my decision, the MD very kindly gave me some time to think things over. Did I use this time to get a grip, and keep a clear head? Not exactly. I used the time to phone my dad (hey - I was 26, and sometimes you need 'dad advice'), and after that I phoned the competitor agency and politely declined their offer. I then happily announced to my MD that I didn't really want to leave, and would love to take on their new team.

I lasted less than 6 months. The team had changed, but many of the factors driving me to leave had not. I did not suddenly begin earning more money (I needed to prove myself in my new team - if anything it was a slight backward step), and I did not enjoy the new sector as much as I had the old one. My frustrations with company policy were still there. I still felt stale and, worse, I felt that management knew that I was looking to leave and would be keeping an eye out for my replacement. I was repeatedly asked (by different managers) if I had plans to leave / to work overseas, and word got out to all my colleagues that I had been looking to move on.

When I handed in my notice for the second time, it was a sad moment (and I admit that I had to work hard not to get teary), but this time my MD agreed that perhaps my heart was not in it, and that I needed a fresh challenge.

National Employment Association statistics show that over 80% of people who take a counter-offer and stay are no longer with their company 6 months on. Many of these will (as I did) discover that the counter-offer is not a fix. Others will be on the receiving end of their company replacing them now that they have demonstrated their lack of commitment. If a company offers you $5,000 pa to stay, they will only have to pay you a small amount of that if they find your replacement swiftly and, in doing so, will have avoided being left in the lurch 'between' workers.

Many companies will not make counter-offers. If your company does then be sure to consider what is motivating them to do so, what is motivating you to consider it, and what life will be like now that they know you are unlikely to be a long-term prospect in the company. Better still, prepare for the fact that you will often feel sad when resigning, and that you may be offered alternatives to stay, but that accepting a counter-offer is very rarely the right decision.